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On this page you
will find comments from readers whose lives have been touched by Joe's
book.
An adoptive mother
from Arizona:
Joe
Soll's book, "Adoption Healing...a path to recovery," allowed me
for the first time, to realize that as an adoptive parent, I too need
healing. My pain, anger and all the myriad emotions that I felt through
the years are just as real as those of my adopted daughter. "Adoption
Healing" is written with such tenderness, simplicity and positiveness
that it makes for easy understanding and gives us the step by step keys
to the healing process. Mr. Soll includes exercises to help us through
the pain which is another plus. In fact, this book helped me understand
my daughter's pain and anger which I never understood before. What a
revelation that was and this is part of what the healing process
entails. I recommend this book for all those who are adoptive parents
or prospective adoptive parents. For me it was an answer to years of
prayer and for the first time I see a light at the end of my tunnel.
YES THE HEALING HAS BEGUN. A BIG THANK YOU TO JOE SOLL FOR WRITING THIS
BOOK.
An adopted woman
from New York:
"Adoption
Healing... a path to recovery" is a book that deals with truth -- not
the way people would prefer to see it, but exactly the way it is. Not
only does it validate those feelings of doubt, fear, anxiety, and loss
that so many adoptees and birth mothers feel, but it gives you ways and
exercises to help you deal with those feelings. I strongly suggest that
everyone read it. IT WILL HELP YOU TO UNDERSTAND YOURSELF, YOUR SISTER
OR BROTHER, YOUR CHILD, YOUR PARTNER OR SPOUSE.
A birthmother from
Pennsylvania:
"Adoption Healing...a path to recovery," more than
anything else gives HOPE to those of us who have traveled the adoption
path, particularly adoptees and birthparents. Having been told in 1966
that by giving up my infant son to be adopted by people who could give
him what I could not...a two parent home, a name, even legitimacy; I
tried hard to believe when they told me I was doing the most loving
thing a mother could do for her child in my circumstance. I was an 18
year old student with no husband in sight. I don't know if they really
believed when they said I would get on with my life and I would forget
this whole unfortunate experience and that I would go on to have plenty
of other children.
Joe Soll's book speaks to the fact that THEY were really, really WRONG!
You never forget and you really can't even totally get on with your
life on some levels. Giving a child up for adoption is a very deep
trauma and tragedy for a woman, and many can't even survive it. It's a
form of soul-rape. While Joe gives exercises, tools and rituals to
adoptees to understand their experience and even begin to heal; he also
validates and acknowledges the pain and deep sense of grieving and loss
the birthmothers live with. And although I have read several women
authors who have written very eloquently about birthmother pain; this
is the first male author that I've read who has deep understanding,
wisdom and empathy for US. My heart was in my throat during much of
this book, but I also felt that Adoption Healing should be required
reading for Adoptees and Birthmothers, AND those who love us. THIS IS
AN EXCELLENT AND VERY WELL WRITTEN BOOK.
An adopted woman
from Oregon:
I am thrilled someone has finally written a book that
directly deals with self-help treatment for the adopted person.
"Adoption Healing" explains the psychological processes an adopted
person goes through in their life, and the effect on him or her. It
then gives simple exercises to help overcome the trauma of adoption.
Even in a loving supportive adoptive family, the adoptee has suffered
from the trauma of separation from his or her birthmother and family of
origin.
An adoption search and reunion is only part of the process necessary
for those who were separated from their birthfamily to heal. This book
helps in completing the healing process. Unfortunately, those affected
by an adoption need to work on their issues through self-help support
groups and books as there are very few mental health professionals who
understand the affect of the adoption experience on the adopted person
and birthmother. This book helps fill that gap.
"Adoption Healing" is not just for adoptees. Birthparents and adoptive
parents can learn a great deal about what their child has endured
through adoption, and ways in which they can help their child, whether
a youngster or adult. Therapists can develop a treatment protocol for
their adopted clients.
I have been waiting for a book like this since I started working with
adoptees and birthmothers 14 years ago as a post-adoption emotional
support group leader. It will help me help others. Additionally, it
will help me deal with my own trauma of being adopted at birth in 1950.
Although, my reunion is years past (and a "good" one), I plan to go
back through the book chapter by chapter and do the exercises. JUST A
QUICK READ HAS ALREADY BEGUN TO EFFECT MY EMOTIONS
An adopted man
from New York:
This a a magnificent book that will help everyone
effected by adoption. It is particularly valuable for adoptive parents,
to give them essential information about the children they love. The
book exposes the myths about adoption and reveals the facts that
everyone involved needs to know. This book offers the opportunity to
help millions of people and I hope it is a great success. BUY TEN
COPIES, NOT ONE, AND GIVE THEM TO THOSE WHO THEY WILL HELP.
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